The love of a mother is like no other! It begins before they ever see, touch or hear their child.
However, I do NOT just love my biological boys, I also love all of the others that are constantly at our house!! Some are related and others are just the kids’ friends.
Growing up, one of the best and most important things that I learned was to treat everybody the same as if they were blood. My mother always treated any other child that came into our lives as though they were my sister or brother, we were equals. There was NO special treatment for any of us, just unconditional love. No matter who they were or where they came from!
I have the enjoyable pleasure of being called “MOM” by my own kids, by the kids constantly at our house and also by lots more in and out of High School! It brings a smile to my face and keeps my heart full!!
I truly wish that others, both men and women could accept kids for who they are on the inside and not judge them by some of their tough exteriors or smart ass ways. We as adults do NOT always know why a child acts the way they do and may never know, but there is always a reason. Maybe they have a broken home, an abusive parent, maybe they are just shy and struggle with who they are, maybe they have a great family life on the exterior but lack some much needed love and attention or maybe they are just an active child who has issues sitting still and staying quiet!!
These kids are NOT grownups, they are still trying to figure out who they are and many of us adults still struggle with our own identities and shame on us for looking down on these kids!!!
I substitute teach at the schools off and on and it sincerely breaks my heart every time I hear a teacher talk badly about any of the kids, when they tell me about a dislike for a particular kid or when they point out the bad problem kids and tell me to just send them to the office if any sort of problem arises big or small! Didn’t they go to school to teach, shouldn’t they have a love for teaching and a love for their students and be concerned with their ability to succeed?!?!?! Why reward them by getting out of class, shouldn’t you be worried about earning their respect which in turn would help them learn and pass your class?!?! (NOT all teachers are like this!!)
All I see are children, kids who have yet to find their true place in the world!! Most of the time their “problem kids” are ones that I have no problems with. Teachers are amazed at the fact I can get their “problem students” to get any work done, after all, I am only a substitute!
By showing you care, by flipping crap back at the kids instead of taking it personal, by NOT letting them get away with stuff, by becoming someone they know they can talk to without being judged, by being there as a role model, by offering stability and a safe environment, and just by setting a good consistent example and sense of some sort of stability……I believe can have a positive affect!!!
I honestly try to live by all of this with my own three sons! I try to be open with my kids, I try to be the best mother I can, yet, at the same time I NEVER want them to be afraid to talk to me, about anything!!! I want to be there, to offer advice and to hopefully guide them in the right direction and to be there for them when they stumble along the way no matter what their age!
The bond between a “Mother and Child” should NEVER be broken, it should remain forever, it starts when a child is in the womb. However, I have seen mothers mistreat, ignore, blame their kids for what’s wrong in their lives, I’ve seen them not care where their kid is even after days of being gone and not checking on them to make sure they are safe, I’ve even seen some mothers pretty much disowning their kids. As a Mother myself, I cannot understand this nor fathom blaming my kids for anything that has happened in my own life! How, as a Mother can you let anything get between you? You are suppose to love, nurture, be their protector and guide them through life! Yes, they will make mistakes along the way, we all did but a Mother should always be there when needed most!!
My boys are getting older, the oldest is already in College, the middle is a Junior and our youngest is a Freshman and I sincerely hope that as a Mother, I have succeeded at doing my job thus far, I am NOT perfect but I am who I am.
To ME…….this is what Motherly Love is all about……..biological or not!
I truly wish everyone felt the same way!!!!